Caught up with Myself, Conversation with Myself

4/20/07 I started getting sick around 3 am. I was up & down most of the remainder of the night/early morning, however you view it. I was freezing one minute, burning hot the next. At first I thought I had food poisoning from Chick-Fil-A, but I was the only one who got sick from it. I called in sick. Could just hear the repercussions from the "supervisor" about that...; her telling others "there's nothting wrong with her", but she was late and thankfully I did not have to talk to her.

Out of my sickness I wrote something really good....

I finally caught up with myself. Gaining ground every second, every word I was behind. I can almost reach out and touch my left should.... when I turn around to face myself, what do I see? I still see the 21 year girl with long, blonde highlighted hair staring back at me in disbelief. She sees the grayer version of herself which is me. "What happened to you?" She asks me. "Will this happen to me?" Life. "Why don't you wear make-up anymore?" I like my sleep much more. I don't have time for that anymore. Besides I work in a prison. Who will see me? "That doesn't mean you are in prison. Even prisoners are entitled to the use of cosmetics." I am not out to impress anyone. If they can't accept me as I am, that's their problem not mine. I have finally become comfortable with myself. I can live with my gray. In fact, I plan to be the older lady with long white hair. It will not be that big of a stretch from yesterday; from you - except for the wrinkles. LOL

I don't want to be vanilla. ~Miranda Lambert~

The rest of the day, days, the weekend is a blur of headaches, chills, fevers, nausea, etc.. Daddy brought me jello and crackers. It was the 1st thing I ate all day. About 2 spoonfulls and 1 cracker. He took Rhett over to mom's to see Uncle R. F. When Don came in, I asked him to find me a bottle of Tylenol. I still think the bladder doc irritated my bladder. I could actually feel the sling hurting, the mess digging into my bladder! Thankfully the Tylenol stopped it. And I thought Alleve was a miracle drug...